Helping And Caring For A Depressed Person

It is not always easy or straightforward to tell if a friend or loved one is suffering from depression. The signs and symptoms of depression often creep up quite gradually, and the depressed person himself would often not realize that they are lapsing into this condition.

If you suspect a loved one is undergoing depression, or might be developing the condition, the first thing you could probably do is to get them to talk about it.

Very often, just talking it out, even if no specific or concrete solutions are provided or no conclusions are arrived at, can make a troubled person feel so much better. And you may well be the outlet that the person needs to vent his or her thoughts and emotions.

There are a few pointers you should keep in mind. Be gentle and not forceful. Do not criticize them, but instead encourage them. Do not use phrases like “just pull yourself together”, “just get on with it”, or “life sucks – deal with it”; these statements do not help whatsoever for people who are going through depression.

Always offer hope, especially if the person is feeling particularly despondent or hapless. If you suspect the person really has an issue, for example if he is quite seriously depressed, you could encourage him to seek expert assistance. Help is readily available, and there are many options available, from conventional medical doctors, to counselors and psychologists, to natural and alternative healers. Generally speaking, a holistic approach to dealing with depression is best, and there is nothing embarrassing about seeking help when it is needed – assure them of this fact. Again, you should try to be gentle and constructive, and not try to enforce your views on the person.

In speaking with someone whom you suspect may be depressed, you need to realize that he or she may not have the same degree of control over their thoughts and emotions as most other people do. Such persons may be “stuck” in certain mental quandaries, so having a listening ear and a discussion partner can certainly help them to untie these knots.

You would need to be patient with a depressed person, guiding him along as he reaches his own conclusions on matters. The answers may seem obvious to you, but it is not helpful for you to force your viewpoints upon him; instead, you need to see yourself more as a facilitator who offers suggestions and guidance. And if they conclude on something which you had already mentioned, try not to tell them “I told you so” – this doesn’t help at all.

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